Gift of Life

Last night, I found out that a person I knew just passed away. He had a heart attack last week. I could not stop thinking about him because exactly three months ago he was at my father’s wake trying to help out. Who would ever think that he will be gone?  Truly death comes like a thief in the night.

At this point in my life, I just figured out my greatest fear. To see a loved one gone, and the thought of leaving my family behind. With my father’s passing, I often think about things pertaining to the after life, about our existence, and some other “weird” things. It is like seeing things differently. Talking to my  husband keeps me grounded. He would plainly state that it is the reality of life. So he does not really think or worry about it. That it is something that we should accept. Maybe I am just about to learn that step.

Last night I told him about one of the things I always pray for. And I said he should pray the same thing so it makes us two. I said I hope we will be blessed together with a long life (I state specifically at least 90 years old) so we can see our children and grand children grow. He replied, “Whatever is God’s will.”

Now, when I kiss or embrace my family, it feels more than that. When I say some good words to a friend or to a relative, I truly mean it. Slowly, my heart is learning how to forgive and how to sing to each waking moment.

This song was in my head when I woke up and I feel the need to share it. It is a beautiful Filipino gospel song. I really love the acoustic version but unfortunately, there is no vocal. For non-Filipino speakers, I included an English translation below. I hope you do enjoy the music.

Sino Ako?

Hiram sa Diyos ang aking buhay
Ikaw at ako’y tanging handog lamang
Di ko ninais na ako’y isilang
Ngunit salamat dahil my buhay
Ligaya ko na ako’y isilang
Pagkat tao ay mayroong dangal
Sino’ng may pag-ibig?
Sino’ng nagmahal?Kun’di ang tao Diyos ang pinagmulan

Kun’di ako umiibig
Kundi ko man bigyang halaga
Ang buhay na handog
Ang buhay kong hiram sa Diyos
Kundi ako nagmahal
Sino Ako?

Who Am I? (English translation)

My life is only borrowed from God
We’re only a living sacrifice
I did not wish to be born but it’s
A God given blessing to have a life
I am glad that I was born…
I am born with dignity
I have love and I know how to love
Because God first loved me

If I didn’t know how to love
If I didn’t know how to be grateful of
The life that God has given me
Then what is my worth?

Waves of Life

I tried resisting the waves

And I got very tired

I think I almost drowned

But people came to save…

Why do I always do that

Though I know I’ll never win?

I know I am hard headed

I know I never learn.

Well I think it subsided now

It seems calm around

I will float in the meantime

And get ready for the next one

The next time it comes crashing

I know I should not fight it

I have to learn how to deal with it

Play along and go with the flow

As how my head knows

That is how life goes

Play along and go with the flow

Til I can happily swim again.

Thoughts On A Rainy Day

The life before me, I will never truly understand.

Stories, books, photos, music, they just give me a glimpse of how it was in the past

But still, I will always be a stranger

The life after I die, I will never get to  know

I will leave my stories and pictures for the future to see

But I will always be a stranger to them

They will never fully understand

My life now is mine

This is the only time I fully comprehend

This is mine

Quick Break – Short Post

I feel like I have been chasing time. I did not even have the time to write my thoughts.And yet, still a lot of things to do. And the day is almost done. Why am I so busy? I guess it is better than have nothing to do? So I took my energy boosting vitamins! I need it.

It is the start of the week. May we all be productive while we feel happy and blessed. Challenges, problems? I will keep fighting you! You may scare me, and make me feel anxious, but I say, you can not defeat me. Life is still beautiful. And my spirit is growing and evolving. I am empowered.

The Day Begins

I heard the birds sing this morning. I always hear them at around six. They sing in chorus and the song gets louder. Everyday, it feels like they are waking us up and  rejoicing for another day has come.

My heart leaps for joy knowing that I am alive. I try to open my eyes. My mind is a blank slate. It takes a while for me to remember what day it is. It takes some processing to figure out what to do, does my son go to school? Is my husband going to work  or is it a weekend and there is no need to rush? Before I get up:

Dear God, thank you

For the sunrise

For the strength and the health to live another day

For keeping everyone safe through the night

For the restful sleep

For this busy day

For the quiet moments

For the hopes, plans, dreams, and inspiration

For the realizations and all other things in my head

For my family and friends

For myself

Please bless us and keep us all under your loving care

Under Your loving protection

Bless us with a beautiful day

Amen.

Then I rush to the washroom and work in my kitchen. My day begins.

Happy Monday, have a blessed Holy Week, Restful Vacation, Wonderful Week!

Hustle, Bustle, Juggle

Mom-Juggling

Routine every morning, done!

Noon time now, reached half of my day

Done with cooking

Laundry on going

Baby still napping.

Clothes to fold, set aside first!

Just got done with a research for my son’s school work

Though I wanted to blog some more….

Hustle, bustle, juggle

So many things done, still so many things to do

Exhausted at the end of each day

Aching legs, aching back

But my job still goes on

Oh dear mother, I feel so happy though

Loving somehow the hustle, bustle, juggle.

It means I have the strength, body mind and spirit

It means I am well and blessed with good health

Hustle, bustle, juggle, I don’t mind at all

It means I have a talent to manage my time

Hustle, bustle, juggle, I am so blessed

It means I have a family under my care

Hustle, bustle, juggle,

Means I am very much ALIVE

Feeling happy doing these things

Being in this place

At this time!!!

Photo credit: http://thelastdegree.com